{"id":20110,"date":"2026-03-11T08:48:48","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T08:48:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/uncategorized\/perfect-partners\/"},"modified":"2026-04-23T04:40:35","modified_gmt":"2026-04-23T04:40:35","slug":"perfect-partners","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/positive-living\/friends-and-family\/marriage\/perfect-partners\/","title":{"rendered":"Perfect Partners"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cNothing big for my birthday this year,\u201d I warned my husband, Angelo. \u201cNo surprises, okay?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t worry about it, Antoinette,\u201d he said. I wasn\u2019t sure if I trusted him, though. Angelo was such a sentimental guy. It was hard to imagine he wouldn\u2019t want to celebrate this birthday \u201cmilestone.\u201d<\/p>\n

The last thing I wanted for my 50th was some over-the-top bash with tons of people. Angelo loved parties, especially <\/em>surprise parties. Me? I hated surprises.<\/p>\n

I guess you could say I\u2019m a bit of a control freak. All right, more than a bit. I write lists for everything. I make lists of lists I need to make! Angelo? He\u2019s the exact opposite. Happy-go-lucky. Laid-back. Impetuous. Romantic.<\/p>\n

His calm attitude kept me grounded through the big stuff, like when my father was in the final stages of Alzheimer\u2019s and Angelo was my rock. When it came to the small stuff, that was a different story.<\/p>\n

I worried Angelo would be late picking up our eight-year-old son, Joseph, from school. Or that he wouldn\u2019t get dinner ready in time. I was constantly leaving him notes and reminders. My birthday was one more thing to worry about. And a surprise was the last thing I needed.<\/p>\n

I hated feeling my life was out of control. I\u2019d sworn that would never happen again. And I knew one thing: I would never allow a man to control my life again.<\/p>\n

Before I met Angelo, I went through a difficult divorce. At 36, after 10 years of marriage, all my plans were in ruins. My life list was in tatters. I desperately wanted to put the past behind me and trust God with the future. But in the back of my mind, I had my doubts. Could I ever trust again?<\/p>\n

Which was maybe why I became even more of a control freak. I spent weekends holed up at home. Going out and trying to meet another guy was asking for trouble, asking for my life to be turned upside down. Finally my mom suggested tango lessons. Seriously! She\u2019d heard of a six-week course at a nearby high school.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d taken tap lessons with Fred Kelly\u2013younger brother of Gene\u2013as a kid. I liked the structure of tap, even then\u2013learning steps, nice and neat. I wanted to feel like that again. But I couldn\u2019t find a dance partner. I\u2019d asked some of the guys at work\u2013they\u2019d all gone pale at the word tango.<\/em><\/p>\n

My sister, Joanne, had promised to join me in the lessons. The week before they were going to start, she dragged me to a fifties dance club to knock some rust off our dancing skills. All at once she was pointing to someone across the room and nudging me. I put on my glasses to take a look.<\/p>\n

A tall guy with long, curly black hair. He was wearing a billowy white shirt. Very Pirates of Penzance. <\/em>I needed a tango partner, right? This guy fit the bill perfectly, down to the outfit. Before I could talk myself out of it, I marched over to him and introduced myself.<\/p>\n

\u201cSono Angelo,\u201d <\/em>he said after an awkward pause. \u201cIo non parlo Inglese. Sono Italiano.\u201d <\/em>His friend Marcos translated. Angelo was from Italy, on a two-month- long vacation visiting family in New Jersey.<\/p>\n

Even better, <\/em>I thought. No chance this would turn into anything, and normally I\u2019d run the other direction from a shirt like that.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou guys want to tango with us next week?\u201d I asked. I did a little dance to demonstrate, putting up my arms tango-style. \u201cTannnggo?\u201d<\/p>\n

Angelo\u2019s face lit up. His eyes danced. \u201cSi, tango! Mi piace il tango.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Then he disappeared. Just ran off. He reappeared minutes later with a red rose. Guess that\u2019s how Italians say yes!<\/em><\/p>\n

The following week, when Joanne and I arrived at the high school gym, I found Angelo waiting inside, ready to tango. \u201cBellissima!\u201d <\/em>he cried when he spotted me, raising his hands and waving.<\/p>\n

I smiled, cautious. This was just a way to get out of the house. No way was I going to get swept off my feet by some Casanova straight from Italy.<\/p>\n

The instructor strode into the gym. He was wearing a silk shirt with wide, frilly sleeves. It made what Angelo had had on that first night seem like a button-down Oxford by comparison.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe Argentine tango is poetry in motion,\u201d the instructor proclaimed. \u201cFirst, we will learn how to walk. Gentlemen\u2013lean on your partner. Guide her in the right direction. And ladies\u2013trust that he won\u2019t lead you into a brick wall!\u201d<\/p>\n

Polite laughter broke out, but frankly, the idea of trusting a man made me queasy. Angelo touched my arm. It was so strange\u2013his grip was both firm and gentle, commanding yet respectful.<\/p>\n

He led me onto the dance floor. We rehearsed some steps. I felt myself relax for the first time in I don\u2019t know how long. I didn\u2019t even mind too much that the man takes control in the tango.<\/p>\n

My high school Italian finally came in handy. I pieced together that Angelo was an artist who designed mosaics for buildings throughout Europe. He had just finished working on an intricate stone courtyard for a castle in Germany.<\/p>\n

He talked to his mother regularly, hummed Italian folk songs and once nursed a wounded bird back to health. Too good to be true, this guy. We parted ways after class.<\/p>\n

I figured I\u2019d never see him again. Probably for the best. Already I was daydreaming about him\u2013that was a bad sign. Surely God wasn\u2019t leading me to this guy. We didn\u2019t even live in the same country.<\/p>\n

Angelo showed up the next week, though, ready to tango. After class he asked me out. I said yes. What was the harm? It was just dinner.<\/p>\n

That one dinner turned into many. I tried to convince myself that our relationship was nothing serious. Angelo had to go back to Italy at some point. I knew that.<\/p>\n

But by week three, he\u2019d become a regular at my parents\u2019 house. He was so kind, so attentive. He\u2019d even been watching American movies on a loop to learn English\u2013just for me.<\/p>\n

The tango, though, was our favorite way of conversing. The Argentine tango was very different from tap. It was improvisational. Spontaneous. No two dances were the same.<\/p>\n

I was in Angelo\u2019s hands, relying on him to lead me left or right, wherever the music took him. Every time I got too caught up in the intricacy of the steps or stared down at my feet, I tripped us up.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, no,\u201d Angelo said kindly, showing me how to turn. \u201cLike this.\u201d I had no choice. I could trust his lead or fall on my face. Even with all that had happened in my life I found myself trusting Angelo. Trusting him and more.<\/p>\n

But what about our relationship? Angelo had already extended his vacation by two weeks. In truth, I wasn\u2019t even sure how he felt about me. He was affectionate and demonstrative, but maybe that was just the way he was. Maybe it didn\u2019t mean as much as I\u2019d come to hope.<\/p>\n

The week before our last class, we went out to dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant. I was fidgeting, tearing my napkin into little pieces. He reached across the table and took my hand, just as gently as he had in that first class.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

That\u2019s what I loved most about him. He knew me so well. He could calm my nerves with one gesture.<\/p>\n

I took a deep breath. I\u2019d take a chance. Improvise, like we\u2019d done so many times with the tango. Trust my heart and trust what God had put into it.<\/p>\n

\u201cAngelo,\u201d I said, \u201cyou are my life.\u201d Those words, words I thought I\u2019d never say again, felt so good to say, no matter how Angelo responded.<\/p>\n

\u201cAntoinetta,\u201d he said, \u201cyou are my whole <\/em>life.\u201d<\/p>\n

Angelo decided to stay in America. Even so, the what-ifs didn\u2019t automatically disappear. There were still twists and turns, moments we never planned for. But I was learning you can\u2019t always plan your life, and so often there is a better plan than you could ever dream.<\/p>\n

I turned to Angelo now. We\u2019d been married for eight years and his eyes still danced like they had when we first talked. I thought about the steps of the tango. The spontaneous beauty of it all. And how Angelo had won me over, easing my fears little by little.<\/p>\n

God had used him to teach me to trust again. I\u2019d always be a little uptight and my husband would always be a little laid-back. That\u2019s what makes us perfect partners.<\/p>\n

I took his hand. \u201cI\u2019ve changed my mind,\u201d I said. \u201cPlan whatever you like for my birthday.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you want, Antoinette? I\u2019ll do anything for you!\u201d<\/p>\n

I gave him a smile and then a hug. \u201cSurprise me,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cNothing big for my birthday this year,\u201d I warned my husband, Angelo. \u201cNo surprises, okay?\u201d \u201cDon\u2019t worry about it, Antoinette,\u201d he said. I wasn\u2019t sure if I trusted him, though. Angelo was such a sentimental guy. It was hard to imagine he wouldn\u2019t want to celebrate this birthday \u201cmilestone.\u201d The last thing I wanted for […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":28726,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"ep_exclude_from_search":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[173],"tags":[58,51],"ppma_author":[1334],"class_list":["post-20110","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-marriage","tag-guideposts","tag-inspirational-stories"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nPerfect Partners - Guideposts Articles<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/positive-living\/friends-and-family\/marriage\/perfect-partners\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Perfect Partners\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"\u201cNothing big for my birthday this year,\u201d I warned my husband, Angelo. \u201cNo surprises, okay?\u201d \u201cDon\u2019t worry about it, Antoinette,\u201d he said. 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