{"id":21972,"date":"2026-03-11T12:09:24","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T12:09:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/uncategorized\/how-to-recover-from-rejection\/"},"modified":"2026-07-07T11:45:27","modified_gmt":"2026-07-07T15:45:27","slug":"how-to-recover-from-rejection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/life-advice\/how-to-recover-from-rejection\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Recover From Rejection"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>Excerpted from <\/em>Fierce Faith: A Woman\u2019s Guide to Fighting Fear, Wrestling Worry, and Overcoming Anxiety<em>, by Alli Worthington<\/em>, <em>with the permission of Zondervan. Copyright \u00a9 2017 by Alli Worthington<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>Jesus knows the pain of being abandoned, the gut punch of having your closest friends betray you. As Isaiah 53:3 says, \u201cHe was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.\u201d But people\u2019s rejection didn\u2019t lessen who Jesus was. He didn\u2019t take it personally or question his calling.<\/p>\n<p>Now I\u2019m sure you\u2019re thinking, <em>Well of course Jesus didn\u2019t let rejection stop him from fulfilling his purpose. He\u2019s God. <\/em>Yes, as God, Jesus turned water into wine, raised the dead to life, and turned one tuna fish sandwich into enough to feed the masses. We don\u2019t expect ourselves to do those things. But Jesus was also human. And there are lots of things that Jesus did, that Jesus modeled, that <a href=\"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/prayer\/inspirational-prayers\/be-like-jesus-pray-for-others\/\">we should strive to emulate<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>I believe that Jesus not getting sidetracked by the pain of rejection is an important lesson for us all. Like Jesus, we may feel the pain of rejection, but we can also know that we are loved and called by name to a destiny set out before us.<\/p>\n<p>Here are five ways to cushion the blow and comfort ourselves when our hearts feel rejected.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1) Don\u2019t assume that the rejection is personal<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Sometimes we <em>are <\/em>left out, but even then, the oversight might not be personal. I often say, \u201cNot everyone can be invited to everything. And that should be okay. We aren\u2019t in high school!\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>2) Ban negative self-talk<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When we feel rejected, we shouldn\u2019t take it out on ourselves. It\u2019s too easy to kick ourselves when we are already down. If we aren\u2019t careful we can take rejection from others to heart and start a pattern of self-rejection through <a href=\"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/better-living\/emotional-and-mental-health\/fighting-negative-self-talk-with-praise\/\">negative self-talk<\/a>. When we feel hurt, we have a tendency to make matters worse because we talk to ourselves in a negative way. The voice in our head is often negative and critical, saying things like, \u201cI shouldn\u2019t feel this way,\u201d or \u201cI\u2019m so stupid,\u201d or some other negative comment. If Jesus doesn\u2019t talk to us that way, why do we think it\u2019s okay to be mean to ourselves? When you catch yourself being self-critical and self-rejecting, you have to pray that Jesus will help you see yourself the way He sees you and that you will treat yourself the way He wants you treated.<\/p>\n<p><strong>3) Remember how Jesus sees you<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Reassurance from other people will never be enough until we know we are loved and valued by God. God made this promise to His people, the Israelites, and repeated it again to believers in Jesus: \u201cNever will I leave you. Never will I forsake you\u201d (Deuteronomy 31:6,8; Hebrews 13:5). What a comfort! Jesus, by His very nature, will never and can never reject us. People may hurt our feelings, leave us out, or even break our hearts, but <a href=\"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/daily-devotions\/devotions-for-women\/devotions-for-faith-prayer-devotions-for-women\/jesus-loves-you-more\/\">Jesus loves us<\/a>, accepts us, and will never leave us. Once we dig in and understand how Jesus sees us and <em>stays<\/em> with us, we can live lives secure in His love. We can grow from self-rejection to self-compassion.<\/p>\n<p><strong>4) Connect with people who care about you<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When we feel rejected, we don\u2019t feel like we belong. Rejection\u2019s pain is especially painful because it touches on our deepest fear triggers of, \u201cAm I good enough? Am I worth loving?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>We have to get that deep sense of belonging back, first by <a href=\"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/angels-and-miracles\/angels\/a-stained-glass-window-deepened-his-connection-with-god\/\">connecting to Jesus<\/a>, then by connecting with others. Our close friends or family members often provide the reality check we need, reminding us that we are loved, that we are accepted, and that we belong. Having good friends that you can visit or talk to at a moment\u2019s notice restores our need for connection.<\/p>\n<p><strong>5) Ask yourself, \u201cWhat would I tell my best friend?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When we feel pain, <a href=\"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/positive-living\/entertainment\/sports\/guideposts-classics-yogi-berra-on-overcoming-negativity\/\">we tend to take a negative outlook on things<\/a>, brooding over worst-case scenarios in our head. But if we get a little distance from our pain, we will be able to see it more clearly. If your best friend came to you and told you about the situation, what would your encouragement to her be? Because when it\u2019s a friend\u2019s pain and not our own, we\u2019re less likely to overgeneralize or blow things out of proportion.<\/p>\n<p>As we learn to fight our fears, especially the fear of rejection, we become better equipped to deal with that fear and learn not to let it keep us from living our lives with joy and purpose.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Excerpted from Fierce Faith: A Woman\u2019s Guide to Fighting Fear, Wrestling Worry, and Overcoming Anxiety, by Alli Worthington, with the permission of Zondervan. Copyright \u00a9 2017 by Alli Worthington. Jesus knows the pain of being abandoned, the gut punch of having your closest friends betray you. As Isaiah 53:3 says, \u201cHe was despised and rejected [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":29633,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"ep_exclude_from_search":false,"footnotes":"","_wpscppro_dont_share_socialmedia":false,"_wpscppro_custom_social_share_image":0,"_facebook_share_type":"","_twitter_share_type":"","_linkedin_share_type":"","_pinterest_share_type":"","_linkedin_share_type_page":"","_instagram_share_type":"","_medium_share_type":"","_threads_share_type":"","_google_business_share_type":"","_selected_social_profile":[],"_wpsp_enable_custom_social_template":false,"_wpsp_social_scheduling":{"enabled":false,"datetime":null,"platforms":[],"status":"template_only","dateOption":"today","timeOption":"now","customDays":"","customHours":"","customDate":"","customTime":"","schedulingType":"absolute"},"_wpsp_active_default_template":true},"categories":[225],"tags":[230,44,48,309,37,26,41],"ppma_author":[976],"class_list":["post-21972","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-life-advice","tag-anxiety","tag-courage","tag-depression","tag-doubt","tag-grace","tag-hope","tag-wisdom"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.4 (Yoast SEO v28.0) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>How to Recover From Rejection - Guideposts Articles<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/life-advice\/how-to-recover-from-rejection\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How to Recover From Rejection\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Excerpted from Fierce Faith: A Woman\u2019s Guide to Fighting Fear, Wrestling Worry, and Overcoming Anxiety, by Alli Worthington, with the permission of Zondervan. 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