{"id":22167,"date":"2026-03-11T12:31:09","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T12:31:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/uncategorized\/living-with-cancer-a-cowgirls-inspiring-journey\/"},"modified":"2026-07-08T14:52:14","modified_gmt":"2026-07-08T18:52:14","slug":"living-with-cancer-a-cowgirls-inspiring-journey","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/living-with-cancer\/living-with-cancer-a-cowgirls-inspiring-journey\/","title":{"rendered":"Living with Cancer: A Cowgirl’s Inspiring Journey"},"content":{"rendered":"

This was it. The very last question after eight days of grueling competition. I waited anxiously<\/a> with the other four finalists\u2014the bright colors of our Western outfits rivaling a Las Vegas sunset, our long curly hair flowing out beneath the stiff brims of our cowboy hats.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d been preparing for this pageant for the last two years, studying every kind of horse and boning up on rodeo knowledge while attending performances all around my home state of North Dakota, riding any horse I could find to improve my horsemanship skills.<\/p>\n

Now, the answer to a single question would determine if I\u2019d be crowned Miss Rodeo America 2007.<\/p>\n

A hush fell over the crowd as the emcee lifted his microphone. \u201cWhat,\u201d he asked, looking directly at us, \u201cis the biggest challenge you faced during your year to become Miss Rodeo America?\u201d<\/p>\n

How could he pick that<\/em> question? My eyes flew to my family and friends, 50 strong, cheering madly in the showroom of the Orleans Hotel in Vegas. They had been my support and strength.<\/a> The only ones who knew that the hair under my hat wasn\u2019t even real.<\/p>\n

Miss Rodeo America was a dream I\u2019d been carrying ever since my sister convinced me to run in a queen contest during high school. \u201cYou should try it, Ashley,\u201d she urged. \u201cYou\u2019re a really good cowgirl.\u201d I\u2019m the youngest of six kids and my entire family rodeoed, so we were going to rodeos and playing in the dirt for as long as I can remember. I competed in barrel racing, pole bending and goat tying, but I always thought rodeo queens were just like any other beauty queens. They couldn\u2019t even ride very well.<\/p>\n

It was only when I won that first contest and went on to the national high school competition that I discovered how much work it was. First of all, queens don\u2019t get to ride their own horses. That\u2019s why we have trouble in the saddle. You might just get stuck with the toughest horse the stock contractors have, and you have to be cowgirl enough to ride it.<\/p>\n

In college, I\u2019d decided to try for the Miss Rodeo America title. My first official appearance after winning the North Dakota state crown was attending the National Stock Show in Denver in January 2006. During the three-week run, I was tired all the time, and lost a lot of weight, down almost three pant sizes. I knew that something had to be wrong. Really wrong.<\/p>\n

The first night I was back in Bismarck I woke up with a terrible pain in my chest, so bad it felt like someone was stabbing me. I couldn\u2019t even sit up in bed. Early the next morning I went to the walk-in clinic. A doctor did an X ray, and it seemed like it took forever for him to come back to the room. He looked at me gravely. \u201cI want you to have a CT scan in the morning,\u201d he said. \u201cAnd your parents should be here.\u201d<\/p>\n

I called them and they came over from Bowman to be with me while I went through a battery of tests. At the end we all sat in a doctor\u2019s office and I listened in a daze. \u201cYou have Hodgkin\u2019s lymphoma,\u201d he said. \u201cCancer of the lymph nodes.\u201d<\/p>\n

I grew up on a ranch, where hard knocks are something you get used to\u2014whether lightning strikes a cow or a big hailstorm comes through and wipes out your entire crop. But this news hit me right in the stomach. I was only 21 years old! Too young to be diagnosed with cancer<\/a>. Right then and there I broke down and cried. All of my hopes and dreams rose up before me\u2014and vanished.<\/p>\n

\u201cHodgkin\u2019s is one of the most treatable forms of cancer,\u201d the doctor reassured me. \u201cBut you\u2019ll need to have six months of chemotherapy.\u201d I nodded my head, trying to take it all in.<\/p>\n

\u201cEverybody will be praying for you back home,\u201d Mom said, holding my hand.<\/p>\n

Sure, I was glad for their prayers\u2014I could use all the help I could get\u2014but I really just wanted things to go back to normal again.<\/p>\n

Each week I made out a list of what I had to do\u2014horseback riding, modeling practice, dance, work on my speeches. I had chemo every other Tuesday. On Thursdays the nausea would set in. Then I\u2019d take the day off and lie on the couch, watching TV and sleeping. By the weekend I felt strong enough to go to one of my Miss Rodeo North Dakota appearances. I could sit tall in the saddle and wave to the crowd. You\u2019ll be okay, cowgirl,<\/em> I told myself. I could fight this.<\/p>\n

But the treatments started taking more and more out of me. Instead of resting for one day after chemotherapy, I had to take two or three days off. My hair started falling out<\/a> too, long curly strands on my pillow when I woke up in the morning. In the shower my hair would clog the drain.<\/p>\n

Hair is so important to a rodeo queen. Big, fluffy, full hair that can fly in a breeze. I\u2019d prepared myself for that day by buying three wigs: Brittany, Brandi and Bridgette. But I left them on their little stands. I didn\u2019t want to wear them. That would be like giving in.<\/p>\n

One morning, though, I was taking my hair out of its ponytail and it just stayed in its clump. I stepped in the shower. As soon as I tried to shampoo my hair it fell to the tiles, blocking the drain. I jumped out in frustration, dried off and picked up that clump. I wanted to throw it across the room. It would be like getting rid of the cancer itself. Then I looked in the mirror. I didn\u2019t even recognize myself. I dashed downstairs and picked up Brittany off her stand.<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay, girl, get to work,\u201d I said, brushing back the golden curls. I pulled the elastic cap over my bald head and put a hat on top of my new hair.<\/p>\n

I wore those wigs<\/a> as much as I had to. They made me feel a little more like myself. But they still couldn\u2019t get me through the roughest patches.<\/p>\n

There were days when I went out to my horses and wasn\u2019t strong enough to go for a ride. I would just turn them out and watch them graze. Teedo, my little three-year-old colt, usually trotted off toward the open field. Not now. He seemed to sense that I was feeling really bad.<\/p>\n

One summer day I leaned against the fence, my Rodeo Queen dreams far away. I didn\u2019t feel like an upbeat, unbeatable cowgirl anymore. I was weak, too weak to even pray.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, Teedo,\u201d I whispered as he came up and laid his head on my shoulder, snuffling along my neck with his warm breath. \u201cAm I crazy to try to do this? Should I just give up and let go?\u201d<\/p>\n

I leaned into his strong neck and wrapped my arms around it. He stood as still as could be, as if he knew I was too weak to move fast. The wind gently lifted his mane and blew it across my face under the warm North Dakota sun. I buried my nose in his horsey smell, feeling his skin twitch when a fly hit his belly. I remembered what it was like to be riding him, carried swiftly along by his strength. Now I could only lean against his mane. God seemed so far away. Lord, where are you when I need you most?<\/em> I thought.<\/p>\n

Teedo nudged me again, and it was as though God were coming to me at my weakest and speaking to me<\/a>: I\u2019m here with you. I\u2019m never far away. Don\u2019t give up.<\/em> I didn\u2019t hear the words as much as feel them flow through me. I thought of all those people who had sent notes and cards and e-mails to me, telling me that they were praying for me, and I felt hope surge through me again. Hope when times are hardest\u2014the heritage of any rancher\u2019s daughter. The crops could fail, droughts could come and go, but God would always be fully present.<\/p>\n

All of this went through my head as I stepped up to that microphone in Las Vegas. How could I tell the judges, and the crowd, that just to be standing here on this stage was a miracle? That I had started out the year thinking that I was going to tell people about the wonderful sport of rodeo, and ended it by telling them about hope and hanging on despite it all instead?<\/p>\n

The chemotherapy treatments were finally done and at my last check-up the doctor said that the cancer was gone. I knew that I had already fought and won the biggest battle I would ever face in my life.<\/p>\n

Even if the flowing hair under my hat wasn\u2019t real, I knew now it was all right. What was real was my battle with cancer<\/a>, and that is what I told them.<\/p>\n

Later, when it was all over, one of the judges placed the Miss Rodeo America crown gently on my head. It felt pretty good, fake curls and all.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This was it. The very last question after eight days of grueling competition. I waited anxiously with the other four finalists\u2014the bright colors of our Western outfits rivaling a Las Vegas sunset, our long curly hair flowing out beneath the stiff brims of our cowboy hats. I\u2019d been preparing for this pageant for the last […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":29729,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"ep_exclude_from_search":false,"footnotes":"","_wpscppro_dont_share_socialmedia":false,"_wpscppro_custom_social_share_image":0,"_facebook_share_type":"","_twitter_share_type":"","_linkedin_share_type":"","_pinterest_share_type":"","_linkedin_share_type_page":"","_instagram_share_type":"","_medium_share_type":"","_threads_share_type":"","_google_business_share_type":"","_selected_social_profile":[],"_wpsp_enable_custom_social_template":false,"_wpsp_social_scheduling":{"enabled":false,"datetime":null,"platforms":[],"status":"template_only","dateOption":"today","timeOption":"now","customDays":"","customHours":"","customDate":"","customTime":"","schedulingType":"absolute"},"_wpsp_active_default_template":true},"categories":[270],"tags":[51],"ppma_author":[945],"class_list":["post-22167","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-living-with-cancer","tag-inspirational-stories"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nLiving with Cancer: A Cowgirl’s Inspiring Journey - Guideposts Articles<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/guideposts.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/living-with-cancer\/living-with-cancer-a-cowgirls-inspiring-journey\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Living with Cancer: A Cowgirl’s Inspiring Journey\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This was it. 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