By Grace Alone

My best friend Debbie’s sons, Mark and David, are both severely disabled and live in separate adult group homes. Caregiving for them in the early days of COVID-19 was nothing like it used to be.

Debbie wasn’t allowed to visit either one of her boys, and so she prayed for guidance about how to take care of them from a distance. After trial and error, she figured out a routine: she’d order toilet paper and masks for their homes every Monday. Then she and her husband would have Zoom calls with them on Thursdays.

Not having his regular routines and visits with his parents was harder on Mark than it was on David. Mark really loves his routines. Before the pandemic, they’d take him out for dinner to his favorite restaurant, Olive Garden, every Saturday, where he’d order the same thing every time. Now on Saturdays, they’d order Mark’s standard meal from Olive Garden, and then FaceTime with him while he ate. Sometimes the food delivery ran late and they would all get frustrated. Weeks turned into months without making sure they got their haircuts, without sharing meals.

This new reality was not what she or her family had ever expected or wanted, but Debbie knew she’d done the absolute best she could under the dire circumstances. Eventually she and her husband even started doing sing-alongs with the boys on Zoom, and she was grateful for this spark of joy found in this time of crisis.