Never Alone

How could my strong, healthy husband have Stage IV cancer? Life had become a nightmare. Every day new symptoms popped up to take care of. Now they’d called in another medication for Bruce’s pain. Racing to the pharmacy, terror crowded my every thought. Why, God? I wiped at the tears coursing down my face, attempting to pull myself together.

Back home, my hands shook as I carefully added the new prescription to the arsenal of medications already lined up like toy soldiers on the counter. There are too many to keep track of. I was terrified I would mess up a dosage or forget to give any one of them at the proper time.

Trembling, I reached for my Bible and collapsed into my overstuffed chair. I opened the pages and drank in God’s reassuring word. Fear not, for I am with you. Slowly, my hands stopped shaking. Knotted muscles relaxed. My heart stopped pounding.

I took a deep breath and faced the bottles and bottles of pills. A thought came unbidden. You need a neat and tidy chart, Sue. It was such a simple act he was showing me. How to bring order to chaos. He was my strength, a help in time of trouble in things both big and small. Therefore, I had no need to fear.