Writing My Way to Peace

Yesterday, I had worked with Susan, a hospice patient, in my role as a therapeutic musician. Her husband, who never left her side, was angry and confrontational. “I don’t like that song. Play something else,” he said harshly. Then, “I don’t like that song either.” Nothing I said or did or played on my guitar pleased him. Susan became frustrated in the process, and I left feeling discouraged. I dreaded going back today.

As I sipped my coffee, I wrote in my journal about the stress of yesterday’s encounter. God, I need courage and guidance. I’m scared. I’m frustrated. I’m angry. I don’t know if I’m the right person to help this couple. I’m not even sure I can do this job anymore.

Writing in my journal has always helped me clarify my thoughts and better cope with my frustrations and fears as I work with the sick and dying. And what I’ve come to realize is that at least for me, journaling is just another way of praying.

I wrote two full pages that morning, pouring out my heart to God, putting all my confusion, anxieties, and feelings down on the page before Him. Finally, I closed my journal, then sat in silence for a few minutes. I was ready to face the day, with a heart more at peace.