Christmastime was for family, but mine was a thousand miles away in Washington State. My husband, Russell, and I made an early visit to my family in the fall. Now I wondered if we’d made a mistake. Back home, I felt so surrounded by love. My own house was quiet by comparison.
I strung some Christmas lights and reached into the decorations box. Way at the bottom I felt a sharp edge. I pulled out a shadowbox frame. Inside was an ornately decorated Christmas tree. A warmth rushed over me as I remembered how it came to be.
I was 17 and spending my Christmas break recovering from surgery. The surgery had been scary enough, but not half as scary as what it meant for my future. I’d always dreamed of having children. After the operation my chances of conceiving were slim. “Maybe you’ll marry a captain who already has children, like in The Sound of Music,” Mom said one day as she coaxed me into eating a bowl of chicken soup.
Mom worked as a nurse, but she’d taken Christmas break off to help me recuperate—and to distract me. She even came up with a craft project we could do together. She unrolled a piece of green felt, handed me a pair of scissors and instructed me to cut out a tree shape. “We’ll go through Grandma’s old costume jewelry for decorations,” she said.
I loved sifting through all those big brooches and clip-on earrings. I’d played dress-up with Grandma’s jewelry since I was a little girl. I imagined her up in heaven accessorizing the angels with her costume jewelry. Mom laughed when I told her. “That’s the spirit,” she said. “Think of all of us who love you and have faith that your future is in God’s hands while we make the tree. We’ll call it the Faith Tree.”
Mom dumped Grandma’s treasures onto my bed. We spent all afternoon sorting. Each piece seemed to have a story. “Your grandpa gave her this ring for Christmas one year.” “This brooch started out as an earring—until I pulled it off of her ear when I was a baby!” We glued the pieces onto the felt tree. Before I knew it, I’d worked up an appetite. “We’ll keep the Faith Tree next to your bed,” Mom said as she cleaned up. “No matter what your future holds, you’ll be surrounded by love.”
She tucked me in and I looked over at my Faith Tree. I hadn’t obsessed about my future since we started work on it. I might not ever have children, but I had to believe I would be surrounded by love just the same.
Sitting in my living room with the Faith Tree now, I felt that same contentment. How could a silly felt tree make me feel so good? I looked at Grandma’s brooches inside the frame and let my mind drift back again. The following afternoon, Mom and I were putting the finishing touches on the Faith Tree when some neighbors I babysat for dropped in to see me. “We just wanted you to know we’re thinking of you,” one of them said, presenting me with flowers.
I buried my face in the big bouquet. “That was so nice!” I said.
Mom walked them out, and one of my older sisters, Lynette, came into my room holding a wire cage. A cloth hid whatever was inside. “I brought you a get-well present,” she said. She set the cage down and removed the covering with one dramatic flick of her wrist. Inside was a fuzzy little hamster. “She’s here to keep you company while you get better,” Lynette said. “Her name is Felisha.”
What a great sister!
Mom and I put the Faith Tree in a shadowbox to protect it. Felisha supervised from her cage, her tiny face and stiff whiskers twitching. She seemed to approve of our project.
I thought about my neighbors bringing flowers, about the pet hamster from Lynette, about all the time Mom took off work to spend with me. Making the Faith Tree had even brought Grandma close again. Surrounded by love in the future? I was surrounded by love right now. Angels had made sure of that.
Back in my living room 30 years later, the Faith Tree worked its magic once again. The miles between me and my family melted away until they felt as near by as Russell in the next room. The house might be quiet, but it was filled with love. The love of family and friends, and the biggest love of all, God’s love for me. I hung the Faith Tree on the wall. My future was in good hands.
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