Deployments can bring extra stress for the families left behind. As the mom of a former Marine Corps son, I’d like to share some of the ways I was able to cope with the stresses that ambushed me.
1) Find someone who’s been where you are and spend some time talking with them. They can help you process what you’re feeling. They can also reassure you that many of the things you’re dealing with are normal, and they can offer solutions.
2) Stay in contact with your soldier. It may seem that you’re adding to his burden by sharing your fears and worries, but the exact opposite is true. Trust me when I tell you that he already knows you’re struggling. Being honest will help you both.
3) Reach out to your extended family and close friends for support. These people want to help, they just may not know how to help. By asking for what you need, you’ll be giving them a precious gift.
4) Keep a journal. Even if you have never done it before, writing out your feelings will help. Give yourself permission to be messy and real. By getting out your feelings, you’ll relieve a lot of pressure.
5) When making plans for the deployment homecoming, include your soldier’s wishes. Then you’ll all have something to look forward to.
6) Don’t neglect yourself. Guilt about what our loved one is experiencing can turn a worried family member into a hermit. You aren’t helping them by neglecting yourself. Keep moving ahead with life, and you’ll both be better for it.
7) Most of all, stay connected with God. He loves you and your soldier more than anyone else. And He is just a prayer away. He promises comfort, and I can tell you from first-hand experience that He delivers on that commitment. Spend time in prayer and in Bible reading for a sense of peace you’ll never find anywhere else.
These are some of the things that helped me. I’d love to know what you’ve done to cope with deployment stress.
