You’ve likely heard the aphorism to “have an attitude of gratitude.” I recently learned that within the field of positive psychology, that’s exactly what gratitude is—an attitude, an overall mentality and mindset that prioritizes appreciation for the gifts and opportunities life offers. Stepping into a season of thanksgiving (both with and without a capital “T”), when we want to be more grateful, makes this learning all the more helpful. Because there is a difference between gratitude and thankfulness.
What is the Difference Between Gratitude and Thankfulness?
The difference between these two important emotions comes down to how we use it in our lives. Gratitude is a general appreciation of life, while thankfulness is a response to a particular event or experience.
For example, you can be grateful for your family, but thankful that your cousin showed up early to help you set the holiday table. You can be grateful for the community where you live, but you are thankful that your neighbor brought your garbage cans up from the curb on a rainy day.
To cultivate a fully, authentically positive mindset, we must practice both gratitude and thankfulness.
You know as well as I do that life is not always easy. To cultivate a fully, authentically positive mindset, we must practice both gratitude and thankfulness. Practicing gratitude means accepting things as they are, while also holding onto our appreciation of things that we value and have access to. Thankfulness grows out of this mindset, positioning us to be able to notice and express thanks when things do go right, like saying “thank you” or even writing a thank you note.
Tennessee psychiatrists James and JR Greene explain the broad power of gratitude this way: “You do not need something good to happen to have gratitude, and when bad things happen, your gratitude does not falter. You know that sad things are just a part of life, and you are happy with the life you lead.”
So ask yourself whether your thankfulness lives under an umbrella of gratitude—and whether your gratitude gets spoken aloud through words of thankfulness. When you pair these two layers of appreciation, you will be building a spirit of authentic positivity that shines over everything you do.
3 New Ways to Think About Gratitude
It might be a challenge to think of things you’re grateful for, but scientific research supports what grateful people know—that taking the time to look inward and express gratitude makes us happier and less stressed.
A gratitude practice is actually simple to start. It could be keeping a blank journal where you record a single item each day you are grateful for—something as big as a promotion at work, or as small as the sudden sunshine of a spring afternoon. If the written journal is too much, you can make gratitude the last “task” you do before you go to sleep at night, just a little passing thought that can rest for a moment on something that enriches your life.
Even during trying times, I’m eager to grow my gratitude habit, and that means coming at it from new angles. A consistent goal as I walk my positive path is to be more mindful of the joy and goodness that is all around me, if only I would notice it. Questions that prompt me to look in unexpected places for sources of gratitude are a helpful part of that process.
See if these three prompts might bring a new breadth and depth to your gratitude experience:
1. Change Your Gratitude Perspective
Choose someone in your life (a family member, friend, neighbor, colleague or the even the person who delivers your packages) and ask, “What would this person say they are grateful for in me?” Perhaps you are a support, or you made that person laugh recently, or you always return emails in a timely fashion or greet them in a friendly way. Cultivate gratitude by looking to others. See yourself through someone else’s grateful eyes.
2. Feel Gratitude for Your Body
Think about your body, and find a part of yourself to be grateful for. It could be your legs that carry you through your day, your hands that create and communicate and soothe and love, or it could be the brain you use to learn and share. We all have reasons to be thankful and feel the positivity of gratitude for our bodies.
3. Feel Gratitude for Small Things
Look around your home and think about the item in it that no one else would likely notice, but that brings you the most joy. Maybe the tiny grater you use to zest a lemon, a vase that you pull out when you bring home flowers, the taste of your favorite toothpaste, or the paper clips you keep in an orderly little corner of your desk. The smaller, the better—while you’re looking, I’m guessing you’ll come across a lot of items that are deserving of your gratitude.
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