Those who fight depression, or what my friend calls the “battle of the mind,” never chose to be in this place. Unless you have dealt with depression, it’s hard to understand what it means to be unable to carry on with life, work, and family responsibilities. The battle of mind consumes all one’s energy, effort, and strength.
Recently Toby (not his real name) has been sending me text messages or calling me to talk, pray, or just listen. In one of our chats, Toby said, “I can’t even put my socks on.” The simplest task has become insurmountable.
Toby has come through these tough times before. The support and help of his faith, family, friends, medication, and therapist have carried him in his lowest moments. But once again, he is struggling and doesn’t know when he will feel better.
How do I help him as his friend but also as a pastor? I make myself available when he reaches out to me. I listen with compassion and a nonjudgmental attitude as his world is turned upside down. I offer encouraging words and share Scripture to strengthen his faith and cope. I pray with him and for him.
Love is the most important gift we can give someone who is depressed. They must always know that our love doesn’t change or waver no matter how they feel or think in their darkest times. Love them for whom they are—a child of God, loved by God.
When I feel powerless to help someone who is depressed, I lean on God to show me the way. I never lose faith and hope that God will help them, especially through their support system.
I have seen many people like Toby get through depression with prayer and guidance. Serving and helping a friend might make us feel unsure or uncomfortable at times, but it’s worth the effort to care and be present—to offer a light in the darkness.