It took a serious bout with depression to teach me one indispensable prayer secret: the skill of “praying until.”
Nearly 10 years ago, I was a pastor in a thriving church. I had a wonderful wife and kids and grandkids. I had every apparent reason to be grateful and happy. But I frequently felt as if I were under attack. Besieged. Opposed and oppressed.
There were many reasons for those feelings, but they’re not important now. What is important, however, is what I learned about prayer in the process.
At times I felt so down that I found it difficult to pray. I would keep my prayer appointment and go through the motions, but I found it difficult to tamp down the panic and despair enough to focus my thoughts. One evening in particular, I remember lying face down on the floor in front of my prayer chair, repeating over and over:
Our help is in the name of the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth (Psalm 124:8, NIV)
Eventually, the prayer morphed into a slightly different—more personal—affirmation:
My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth (Psalm 121:2, NIV)
I prayed those words, affirming that truth, for a half hour or more. And that’s when something happened.
By the time I rose from my prone position, I believed the words I’d been praying. At some point—I couldn’t have pinpointed just when—my spirit began to agree with God’s Spirit.
Not a thing had changed (as far as I knew) in my external circumstances; I was still me, my problems unresolved, things looked as bad as they had before. But those words, that truth, had sunk in to a deeper level in me.
I prayed, and then I believed. I prayed, until I believed. I prayed, until I experienced something like the flip side of Romans 8:16 (The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit. NASB)—my spirit agreed with the Holy Spirit.
READ MORE: HOW PRAYER HELPED HER OVERCOME DEPRESSION
I’ve repeated that experience many times since then, praying “until.” I recommend it. I think it is a way of aligning my conscious and subconscious thoughts and feelings with the “mind of Christ” that lives in me (1 Corinthians 2:16).
I think it signals to my emotions that they are not in charge and wrestles them into submission not only to my mind and spirit but also to the Lord who lives in me.
It is a way of participating in the answer to another frequent prayer of mine: “I believe, help my unbelief” (Mark 9:24).
