Pray for my enemies? My first reaction is, “Ugh, no thanks, I’d rather not.” My second reaction: Heck, I don’t have any enemies. Everybody likes me.
I had been deluding myself with this pleasant fantasy until the other day when I saw someone walking on the other side of the street, far away enough that he didn’t seem to see me, a man I had considered very much an enemy. I had once wished him dead and no doubt the feeling was mutual.
It all came back to me quite vividly, that period I had vilified him. I imagined all sorts of terrible things happening to him—being struck down by a stroke or making a fatal trip to the ER. Not kind thoughts, mind you, but that’s what happens when you become consumed by having an enemy. The enemy takes over a big chunk of your emotional real estate, you imagination, your peace of mind, your soul.
My only way out was to do what Jesus said and what I had been avoiding all along. “You have heard it said, you must love your neighbor and hate your enemy,” Jesus said, “But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:43-44).
Quite frankly, I was glad Jesus didn’t say “like.” Liking my enemy would have been impossible, but loving I could work at and loving meant I had to pray for him. The two seem to work hand-in-hand in Jesus’ command. Praying for your enemies forces you to think about who they are and why they behave the way they do. You acquire, almost against your will, compassion for them, and compassion is not only the object of prayer but its best reward.
I began to see why Jesus would ask us to do something this hard. It’s good for our mental health. It defines prayer as something that stretches us beyond our comfortable confines. Loving enemies is crucial to making his “kingdom come.” I think Jesus’ command is one of the greatest lessons in prayer. To love your enemies is to pray for them and to pray for them is to love them. It’s an essential tool to developing a compassionate heart.
No, when I saw my former enemy across the street I didn’t rush over to embrace him, but he was normal, just another human being, not some monster of my imagining. That seemed a victory and a relief.
Got an enemy? Give thanks for them. They’re going to help you grow spiritually. You don’t have to like them. To love them is enough.
